Vetting time...

You may have heard of this one before...Vetting time...a crucial first step in the lifestyle. To explain it better it's basically the 'Let's get to know each other' period but there is a major difference between a vanilla couple and a BDSM couple. In BDSM, getting to know someone doesn't mean 'oh yeah, I like the same kind of music you do' or 'yes I love dogs too'. In BDSM you go deep, very deep. Peeling away layers you never knew you had, and your partner does the same. Communication is so important and in this relationship, nothing can be off limits. Your partner has to learn everything about you, your desires, your fears, your past, your future, your life...Vetting time can take a long time as well, it's not a quick one-stop shop before pulling out the whips and chains, trust me, you're far from that. There is no set time and it can take months or even over a year for some until they are comfortable enough to take the next step into consideration time. Trust has to be there, some things in the BDSM lifestyle is dangerous and it's crucial that you trust your partner 100%.