When a sub fails...

This is something that happens, happened to us recently. I gave a task, a simple one in my mind, easily achievable. As a Dom when I give a task I expect that task to be done, no excuses, no long drawn out explanations. It's what we've agreed upon and part of our dynamic.

I won't get into the details (because you know, some things are private) but long story short, she failed. It's not the first time either. Of course, we are all human and life happens but when you split the two of us up, you will have two very different pictures.

1) Me: In those moments it makes me feel as if I've failed as a Dom. In those moments, my dominant side did not come through and therefore I could not lead. In my head, a million things run through. What did I miss? What went wrong? Did she do this deliberately? Is something bothering her? Is she stressed?

2) My sub: of course knows she failed and feels terrible about it. Feels as if she didn't structure her day correctly. Feels as if she didn't try hard enough. Is stressing about not completing the task. Wondering what she could have done different.

In the end. We talk. We communicate. We talk to one another until we are blue in the face and ready to rip each other apart but at the end of the day? We resolve it. We are not perfect nor will be ever be. But we are both willing to continue communicating, loving and work on our bond. It's when the communication stops, the walls crack and without proper care or realization, they very well may crumble.

After our discussion, she said she never intended for me to feel a lack in my dominant side and felt terrible for it and I had to understand that yes, sometimes life gets in the way, no matter how much we plan, desire, or demand.